Granny Growing Up (Or maybe not)

An old friend of mine told me she was having trouble with her file cabinets. The trouble is there were too many of them. Her husband might leave her if she tried to squeeze in another file cabinet So, she is is purging her files. My file was one to go. It contained every bit of writng I had ever sent to her. 25 years of Christmas Cards! with "family letters" included. There were all those years of my life printed out on red or green paper. Did I know I was lucky.? Yes, I knew but I didn't know just how lucky until all those memories came back.

There it is all written out. The weeks, even months spent with family at Serene Lakes. Skiing, picnics, hiking, canoeing, skinny dipping, ice skating, making ice cream, jigsaws and games There was fun in the flatlands too. Tennis, folk dancing, Greek Dancing, there were the family trips: Oregon, Washington DC, Pensylvannia, the Tetons, Later Art History trips to Europe. trips to Europe, and trips to Hawaii to visit offspring. The weddings, the parent weekends. And then the grandchildren Watching them at Serene Lakes growing up in the same place just as their parents had. Mostly using the same stuff. Catching crayfish, turning the crank on the freezer, flying off the rope swing and then at last learning to drive in the parking lot. Also watching them grow and being priveledged to share in their many accomplishments.

The fun things are great memories but I have been heen there,done that. The difficult part of ageing for me is becoming irrelevant. Nobody escept the dog needs me. Nobody needs my advice. Nobody needs my help. Quite the opposite is true, I could not even finish this blog without consulting a grandchild. There is plenty to keep one busy. Volunteering, classes. friends, but nothing beats having a call at Thanksgiving to ask how to make mashed potatoes. I have a 91 year old friend who is active and busy most of the time. However, she says "we have all just lived too long. We are no longer necessary" I agree except I'm not really interested in the alternative.

I have a friend who belongs to a group that is studying how to transition to old age successfully I don't know if I am good at aging or not. I just know I can't seem to help it. I don't think that wishing to relive the good times past is quality ageing. I welcome advice. Ogden Nash says, "You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely", Jerry Garcia says "we will survive"., Pete Seeger says "My get up and go has got up and went. But in spite of it al I'm able to grin and think of the places my get up has been" Jimmy Buffett says "I'm growing older but not up" my great, great great grandmother says "Life is like a summers day it seems so quickly past, Youth is the morning bright and gay, And if it is spent in wisdoms way, We meet old age without dismay, and death is sweet at last." So as I'm not spending a lot of time skiing or on the tennis court I have lots of time to search for wisdon I only hope I'll recognize it when I find it.

-Louise

Forgetting to Pay Attention

As a growing up person I am especially embarressed when I forget something.  Not  like a dentist appointment but perhaps the movie I saw last night or the book I just finished.  Friends smile (smirk) and say "Oh she is just having a little senior moment" In my opinion that is not it at all. A senior moment is when something good happens because you ae OLD.  Forgetting occurs when one does not  to pay attention in the first place. Take an art museum for examble  Take the Tate.  When there I have been accused of drifting along thinking "Oh that's a pretty picture"or "Wow did he really look like that" and later not being able to identify the painting or much less the artist.  Just not paying attention.  I should think about the year it was painted , the importance of the brush strokes or the use of symbols, all that  kind of thing.  I'm sure if oue of my grandaughters showed me a photo of the man she was sleeping with I would remember every square inch.  That and any details I could manage to pry out. Although I might, in the long run, be happier if I just remembered the dentist appointment. 

It is the same with reading.  I often find I have read an entire page while thinking about my dinner menu.  I can look at my watch and 30 seconds later wonder what time it is. Oops, I didn't pay attention.  So if it seems your friends and family are fogetful  perhaps they are just not paying attention.  Try talking about subjects that are more interesting, That is if you don't forget.

-Louise

Why is it?

Why is it?  If little Susie goes potty all by herself she is rewarded with kisses and hugs. If granny goes too the necessary comments are" how many times today" or "perhaps she is becoming incontinent"  If Junior gets a speeding ticket three days after receiving his drivers license he may be grounded but they all think it is humorous.  On the other hand if Granny has a little fender bender in the grocery store parking lot,  the whispering sounds like "should we consider taking her car keys away?"  If Mom gets lost on her way home from Book Club. A few jokes about too much wine..  If grandma gets lost we may soon be headed for Chez Geriatrics  If Junior replaces the ceiling light bulbs in the kitchen he is a hero.  If Grandma replaces them she is in big trouble for climbing the ladder. If Dad can't work the new state of the art can opener the can opener is defective  If Grandma can't program the new DVD player she's stupid.  If junior can't think of a word it is because it is not on the list he is studying.  If Granny can't think of one she is may be senile.  Perhaps Granny just has a bad attitude or not?

-Louise